18 September 2005

Viva la Blockbuster Rewards

Generally speaking, I don't go to the movie theatre. My reasons are not the usual, it's too expensive-I can't get a babysitter, sort. I do, however, have reasons. Good ones.

The Restroom- Ewww...theatre restrooms are disgusting. Some day I'm going to hang out in one and take a count of how many butts land on one seat in an hour. No can do. And what good is a movie without the depth-chart sized Diet Coke?

Children- No, not mine. I don't want to sit in the dark, engrossed in a story and hear a child talking, whining, crying or otherwise making it's presence known in any way. Worse yet, is when the movie is adult in nature and people bring their kids. I spend the whole evening being pissed about poor parenting instead of watching the show.

Girls- On the few occasions I've attended a movie with my significant other, he spends the majority of our "date" watching the teenage girls in tight jeans go by. He is so blatant and offensive that my night is invariably ruined. I do somewhat enjoy fantasizing about poisoning his butterlike popcorn topping, so maybe that one is a wash.

Seating- I don't enjoy sitting in one place for an hour and a half or more. It makes me hostile. Seriously.

Did I see XYZ movie? Nope, but I'll certainly give you a review when I can rent the DVD, watch it in my family room alone and use the toilet I just cleaned.